We got married on April 5th 2008 and have been struggling financially since July. First it was us together spending money using credit cards. Those quickly got maxed out. I had provided my wife with a Chevron credit card which she maxed out within a two week time frame and nothing to show for it. I then made a decision to borrow money from banks to get ahead on some of the bills and pay off the credit cards. Which I should have chosen to pay off Bank loans instead. Because the credit cards where maxed out again in shorter time and over the limit worse than before. My wife began to borrow from online payday companies and in most cases using my social security number. Which results in the worse scenarios possible. My credit score was exceptional now we are not able to pay any of the loans credit cards or payday loans. My credit score is dropping faster then Equifax can compute. We were able to address short term bills, but once all the bills were somewhat caught up. We began getting bank overdrafts, we are now on a weekly basis overdrawing the account due to her writing check for things we so called need. For every over draft no matter how small we are charged 25$ and mostly from checks that she wrote knowing that we dont have the money in the bank. Which can add at an alarming rate when the bounced checks are reprocessed again after they failed the first time. So any one check can be a 50$ charge not including the fees by the receipent of the check. We have argued countless times about this to the point of her making physical contact with me and me threating to end our relationship. Yet 2 weeks later it reoccurs again to the point that I dont say anything because I dont want to deal with the arguing. She has admitted to me that she has a problem with spending money. We are to the point to where we are struggling just to pay for bare neccessities. Utilities, Gas transport. Bank Loan, Car Loan, Insurance, Child care, Rent, We dont make enough to keep these bills up. I am to the point to where it would be better for us to end the relationship move back to our parents and get our lives back in order. She is completely torn and does not want this to happen. I would like for us to be happy and live comfortably. But i dont know what the next step is when she has this problem thats going to continue to keep us from progressing in this financial struggle. What should i do force the relationship to end or enforce some type of restrictions? Some one please help!
Thank you all for such quick and great responses so very helpful. As for a seperate checking account or living on cash alone great options. We both work she gets a check. My job requires direct deposit so i have to have an account. We have a joint account currently and had to close one account previously due to the payday loan companies taking out twice as much than is owed. She has also opened up another account, in her own name at another bank. She has been going to the payday loan websites again and almost certain she is using my social security number to get the payday loans deposited. That arent gonna be paid back. She promises she has not done this yet but is there anyway i can prevent my information from being used without causing her to be charged with identity theft.
These are our bills a month
350 child support for my other children
340 child care for her child
320 gas transport to our jobs
240 or more for food and house items
250 rent
262 carloan
167 bank loan
50 heating gas bill
67 Cable TV/internet
153 Bank loan for paid billz
125 cellphone for us to keep in contact for emergencies
137 insurance
125 light bills
I make 670$ every two weeks
she makes 580 every two weeks
I had suggested she pay the 340 child care for her child, 320 gas transport to our jobs, 240 or more for food and house items – But i am stuck with the rest and its just not possible on our income.
Get Home, Auto, Student Loans Information
Recent Posts
- Making Loan Opportunities with Bad Credit Personal Loans
- Maximise Your Probabilities of Getting a Tiny Low Business Loan
- Cars Loan Big Save Tips
- The Way to Borrow the Instant Money with Payday Loans
- Some Tips of Bad Credit Auto Loan Refinancing
- Tips to Qualifying Credit for Home Equity and Mortgage Loans
- What type of financial assistance from the Department of Education?
- Personal Loan Calculator you can calculate your online instantly
- General store and Keyword
- With the passage of time the debt limit has been raised several times
Browse by tags
auto Auto Loan bank best business college consolidation credit Debt education finance financial government home interest internet loan Loans money mortgage News online payday payment people personal refinance student student-loans Student LoanRecent Search Post
fifth third bank loan payment, Fifth Third Bank Loan Payment, chase auto finance code, HOW TO MAKE A WESTERN UNION PAYMENT TO FIFTH THIRD BANK, 647 credit rating, fifth third bank car payment, fifth third bank payments online, what credit bureau does chase auto pull from IL, what credit bureau does chase auto pull from IL, fifth third bank auto loans,Popular Searches
fifth third bank loan payment, alpln loan, Fifth Third Bank Loan Payment, alpln, fifth third bank auto loans,© 2012 Loans References | Powered by WordPress
either end it for good or you take control of the money either by having just a account in your name or by restricting her spending a week
You need to get a couple’s counselor to help you – this way she won’t feel so defensive when things are coming from you. She might also hear things better coming from a counselor. I know it’s like that with my husband – when it comes from the counselor or dr., he really hears it more than if I told him.
If you really love each other, then counseling is the one thing you NEED to do. Your feelings are completely valid. Money is the one thing we all use to pay our bills, how we provide roofs over our heads, etc. – so you really do need to make that appt. Good luck.
Make a budget!!! call all the credit cards to set up minimum payments… they will do this and throw the cards away… dont cancel them, just throw them away… next close the checking account, everything is to be done with cash… tell the banks you will make minimum payments you can afford… everything is to be done with cash and to a budget… when the gasoline budget is up for the month… its up… so you have to be careful… this does work and they will work with you… if you make an honest effort and pay bills first… eat light.and cheap.. thats one place you can save lots of money!!!
I am sorry to hear that, but after the second time she maxed out the credit cards, she would of no longer been able to use them.
Does she work, if so, maybe one or both of you need to get a second job until you are back on track. Maybe you will have to move to a cheaper apartment. Cut back on the cable, maybe get rid of cell phones or a land line phone. Start living on a tight bugget, and on cash.
Good luck, try watching the show till debt due us part.
I think you should confiscate that checkbook from her, cut up those credit cards Open a bank account where you can only access it. Pin all the bills and your paycheck to that new account . Start paying off your bills. Does your wife work? if not tell her to get a job…but she prolly would squander her pay. /sigh i feel for you.
Why are you allowing your wife to drag you down? Shut all accounts and have just one in your name,you should have done this ages ago. It sounds bad enough that i think you should move out and back to parents or you are going to be paying that lot off for life. It’s outrageous your wife has put you in this position and that you allowed her to.
Open up an account in your name only. Have your check deposited into that account. A lot you wife x amount of dollars for each we. Have it transferred to your joint account. Take away all her credit cards and her check book.
If she doesn’t agree with those terms then you just need to get out of the whole situation.
Sit down with her have all the bills on the table, add them all up write it down on a piece of paper & tell her that is how much money you BOTH owe. Because you are married SHE also owes the money.
Don’t give her any checks or credit cards only a limited amount of cash.
She needs a job. Work out all the weekly bills & tell her that she needs to pay her half her share of the bills she will soon get the message. On her first pay take the money for the bills off her. You should be in charge of paying all bills,
Kick her to the curb & fast.
I had one of those & found she was stealing from the marriage every chance she got. Was tough to do but dumped her & moved on.
Now happily married to a “normal wife” and we have no conflict & NO debt!
Hi better idea. figure up all the bills.
Your bills are 2275 and your total income is 2500
You can do it actually its just going to be tight.
And for the cell phones you can get 2 verizon prepay phones for 20 a piece.From walmart and get the bundle plan where you have free texting to anyone that has verizon all month for 10.00
And it still has 911 for real emergencys.And that would knock 125 down to 30 a month.Saving you not much but it will help.And getting rid of the internet and cable yes i know its nice having but if you cant afford it you cant afford it.That would save a nother 70 a month. And then maybe find apply for food stamps and child care assistance.
I dont know where you are but here in indiana the child care assistance pays all but 25 a week for child care.
When a person has to take out loans to pay off credit cards, it’s time to cut them up. Your wife should never have had access to these cards after her spending sprees.
If your wife has a problem spending money, it probably gives her some sort of short-term comfort; however, she could consider therapy for the issue. It’s up to her to change this behavior.
I can’t tell you whether to end the relationship or not. Restrictions should have been in place long ago, however.
I sure hope this works out… i know the discomfort of not having enough money to pay the bills and buy necessities.